I looked into the past
watching from the sidelines
as everyone took the things
that told me they were mine
reaching towards them
lit them up brightly
so everyone else saw it
while I was making a connection
someone dashed in
to capture what was mine
They cheered in taking
what they would break
So I let it go on that way
because sooner or later
I was always called forth
to repair what they had
but never could understand

You look so good in blue
Squinted eyes in the clouds
the days might be rainy
and you might be taken tonight
but those lips were meant for me
Of course the moment I found you
the whole world saw you
blazing into their reality
and while I helped you out
all it did was send you miles away
until someone with oven mitts on
was able to hold the inferno
and I got to thinking
that this heart of mine loves
just to bring things to life
but never to be recognized
being alone and in love
is my natural function
to let it all go

But Mark told me to take it
to recapture the right
so that idiots shouldn't be
drug through the mud
in the name of learning
But I never figured out
how to steal from the needful
even if I have a rubicks cube
in hand while figuring out
how to save the concept of life
someone always takes it
the puzzle is toyed with
then thrown away before my eyes
I dive into the dumpster
to gather it again
and as I make some progress
someone else steals it away
to set me 10 steps back
to figure it out again and again

While I am a princess
I am far too busy keeping the peace
to find my prince
who might just be in the same situation
and while I hear the words
that should change my mind
I still can't figure out
how to follow my heart
since it's always taken from me
hidden in the hands of the lazy
only to be cast aside
when they can't figure out
anything but digression
I am always pulling my emotions
out of the waste basket
because something hard
should just be gotten rid of
since the heart looks like a puzzle
when it can't be completed
it must be landfill fodder

My darling dear cutie pie
you're riding my love
into the arms of someone else
So how can I believe
that this toy shouldn't be
another unwanted christmas gift
while some part of my head
tries to assure me
that your love is mine
while your breath is on my shoulder
the other half of this bed
is cold and empty
and even if I close my eyes
and i can feel your arms
engulfing me there is no warmth
so when I open my eyes
I am still alone
how wrong is it to want
you next to me when I wake?

Sooner or later we would come back
to letter jackets and second hand cars
to utility over vanity
But since we failed theater
we can't play star crossed lovers
I missed the tryouts for playing
So i keep coming around
just another one of the crowd
knowing that even super stars
need some kind of comfort
to prove that their life has worth
But those eyes always excelled
in opposition for my failure
And the tears I heard you cry
when both of us were tethered
hardly spoke the words I needed

While I never should have teared up
I couldn't help it
falling to my knees every time
to prove to you how strong I can be
So that if any time you get weak
we will be protected
But it was never that obvious
that all this shit I went through
was to build me up for you
and since you never leave me
I am always reminded that you are.
the simplicity of the argument
sends my eyes liner trailing
down my face
and now someone is breaking up with the joker

Charisma brought me a bottle of wine
to prove that she believes in me
and while I should be comforted
the replay of her commentary rings
about how similar we are
And I can't take the Idea
that you might chase her down
And while she has no interest
I can't shake the feeling that
this rubics cube will be taken
and tossed between you two
as if my feelings were meant
for a game of catch
which I am not permitted to take part in
Every sign under the sun
has no idea how to take us
something else will drag you away
leaving me without a heart

And while there is still peppermint
caked in chocolate
It is still sucked into a sharp point
used to be a weapon
instead of a means for healing
to get rid of stomach aches
to hypen clairity of thought.
Still this is the world in which I live
Where I become a weapon
and my needs are dismissed
I am now an exploding bullet
a bit of metal to be shot out
while all the time
cutting through the air
silenced by the ideas
of sharing this body with another
but it never mattered what I dream
I am the perfect shape and size
to be a detriment to someone's way of life
since the apple of my eye
put my heart away under the bed
I have nothing else to do
but be a projectile to harm one another

I guess we both got lodged
in the lives of others
who were so grateful for us
that we are held away
from our own desires
but there is no steam from this heat
and from the hole I can see you
stuck in your own hell
would it be alright
if I wanted to stand beside you
even in the place you hate
I can do what you never asked for
and decorate the firery cavern
so that even in the underworld
we can have a place to call home

I don't need a ring or a promise
I just have to have your hand
clasped in mine
So while we can't spend this lifetime
in a little shelter in the woods
I can always be next to you
so that what makes no sense
will not be able to shake us up
and when the mood hits you
you'll have a body which will reflect
the ways you show yourself
and while it will appear reflected
the means will be my own
making the things you hold dear
stronger by my very own similarity

the boy will come alive
by the girl who is trying to survive
i'll give you three guesses
who I want to be going out with
when you never tell me its you
I'll take you by the wrist
so you know it was always you
that I was thankful you were there
in a way I started to hate
but in a way which molded
this heart to love you correctly
if that isn't enough for you
the tears i am always wiping
from my face as I type
should be enough to let you know
That this string for you is true

So tonight I will cry in honesty
because its hard like this
when I can't ask you to be with me
But I have to tell you
Just how much I need you here
I bet there are a million things
that keep you occupied
which have nothing to do with me
But I am in love with a love story
which I can't seem to unravel
so I keep reaching out
to caress your cheek
with my truest meaning

So tell me horatio
since you aren't involved in this mess
How Do I tell hamlet he isn't insane?
That in fact I still want him
even as his world is falling around him
how do I prove to him
that I am the thing he is missing
Golly Gee I can't figure it out
since your face proves you don't care
while I doubt your meant to
something crashed against my head
all kinds of broken fall around me
But I don't mind cleaning up your mess
while you break bottles against imbiciles

But I suppose I had better believe
these feelings I have aren't
special to myself.
someone else already proved to me
that no matter what I feel
someone else better will show up
and thats exactly what happened
while I wanted my own chance
to prove myself wrong after all these years
you showed me that espcially my heart
would defy me to break me
and that rubics cube on your keychain
is my very own love for you
and if it ever gets dirty or ugly to you
throw it away like everyone else
cause I'll always be able to find it

Since you linger without thinking
perhaps you will see me
covered in tattered toole
dressed in stained cotton
gathering my misgiven once more
as I hold it to my chest
it will solve itself
and on completetion it will shine bright
my rags will become a gown
maybe you will catch me in my glory
more than others can see
before I run off to hide in the alley
cloaking my own beauty
so no one is made to feel inferior
to something as simple as me.

But I should finish up with something
I've finally seen you as you should be
that is, I have seen who you really are
while you never exactly hid it
you weren't close enough for me to taste it
and more than ever I am in love
Before I give myself completely away
Well you take me by the wrist
Ask me my name so you can call me out
so that the next time i ditch between buildings
you can tell me where you are
so if there is reason for us to be together
we can say what it is we mean
so that I won't always be running away
you can keep me from hiding

So I wont lie to you anymore
all I needed was someone to stop me
from always looking for something else
I want you to be that something else
So I can stop seeking a new horizon
Since I know tomorrow exists in your hands
put them into mine
So I can touch something useful
which will prove to me that I am not useless
hold me back, keep me there
so that the only thing I see is you
giving me reason to catch my breath
But if you stop me promise you'll keep me
show me that I have some worthy use
which is attractive enough to you
to step inside the ring of fire
to show me just what I wont dare believe